Yes Man
Have you seen the movie Yes Man with Jim Carrey? I was on a long haul flight with it playing on those monitors hanging from the ceiling. Seriously – Air France 747’s need to be updated to the current century. Anyway, the woman behind me asked me to put my seat forward in the middle of the movie. This was not for any solid reason, such as meal time and she needed room to eat. She just did not like having me reclining back in what she believed was her space. It was OK for her to recline, but she did not want me to.
With Yes Man on the small screen you can imagine my predicament, as there was a lot of momentum in the air just to say “yes”. However, I did not succumb to the moment; but, rather, I said no, almost politely. The same thing happened to me the week before. The passenger behind me felt that it was unfair for me to recline. I said no then as well. In between those flights I had yet another passenger request that I give up my isle seat for the window for the purpose of freedom to get up on a regular basis. I tried to be more polite when I said no this time. For all the miserable trips when I have sat in the middle seat with a full bladder, I feel justified in keeping isle seats when I can get them.
Some folks believe they should have their comfort at others’ expense. Sorry, but that does not work with me. I remember as a kid listening to a sermon in church that opened with a story about dessert. One person ate theirs and one person saved it for later. When later arrived, the immediate gratification dessert eater requested that the delayed gratification person share the booty. The only part of the sermon I recall from this experience is that it would be OK to say no. Unfortunately, I don’t remember all the rationale, but I am quite certain that some of the lesson from that sermon would prove really useful right now. Thank you anyway Pastor Bretcher, and sorry for not paying better attention.
This happens in CRM programs frequently. Some groups want stuff that comes at the expense of others, and, sometimes, the answer is really appropriate to be no. Jim Carrey ultimately comes up with the correct criteria for saying no, which is what I believe is the solution here as well. When you have good logic for why it is sometimes yes and sometimes no, things are easier. So, then the question becomes, “what makes good criteria?” That is harder to answer directly, but I think that it will depend on having agreements on scope and budget and other program parameters. In other words, this stuff can’t just be random “you can have this, but you can’t have that” kind of criteria.
Perhaps it is best to have your criteria for what is a yes and what is a no be defined by your steering committee. A good governance structure is the solution to a lot of tough situations, and this is certainly one of them. When I fly I rely on my flight attendants for that kind of objective oversight, but it did fail me recently. So, just make sure you set up your steering committee with some solid direction at the beginning of your project. Otherwise you may have to tell them you won’t be putting your seat upright just because the person behind you is too large for the space they are renting on the plane. After all, if the airline wants their passengers to be comfortable, it should be at their expense, not yours.
Bon Journee!
